Apathy
Outpacing Lust As Leading U.S. State Of Mind
WASHINGTON,
DC--A federal study released Monday finds that for the first time in U.S.
history, apathy has supplanted lust as the nation's leading state of mind.
"It appears that the average citizen is now too apathetic to even pursue
sex," the study read. "At the moment, there just isn't much that we as
a people give a flying fuck about." The study was based on phone surveys,
brainwave analyses, and the recent ratings victory of CBS's JAG over the
Democratic National Convention.